The First Move

   Recently, a guy on my Twitter timeline tweeted about ''girls should no matter how hot they are, never ask a guy out, because he will lose interest and not like you again''.
I find it hard to understand or believe this statement. Is it referring to the lust aspect of things or just generally? Afterall, if you genuinely like someone, it wouldn't or shouldn't matter who ''makes the first move''. - especially when it's dependent or such a trivial thing as what sort of genital you have. :s
    In reference to lust, i reckon it goes thus, ''I like the girl so, i will do a chase. There is a thrill to the chase and much excitement  in it for me. When we have our adrenaline pumped and our hearts and the hearts of our genitals are beating fast and everything is peak, we will bring ourselves to an explosion/merging of bodies in my bedroom or mom's kitchen(where ever the hell we deem fit)''.
  With this in mind(i hope you have put yourself in this guy's shoes), this guy plans on a chase but just as he's starting out, Sisi Eko or whoever, as the case may be, is already feeling the heat and is not in the mood for fronting, she makes her move. In essence, she has killed his chase/plot of his little fantasy which he was planning to bring to life(without her knowledge).
  This is why he loses interest and possibly begins plotting for another hot tottie. If and when he finds the new bird, and she's the type that will play the chase game(since she's probably so frigging used to everyone saying ''never ask a guy out''.) When all is said and done, and there is no more thrill, guy's gonna leave innit? New girl will be heartbroken thinking *i wish* :p {In her mind, she musta been expecting Mr was going to trip, head over heels and they'd get hitched like Prince William and Catherine} :p *I couldn't resist the urge to write that* x_x
  I think, in her shoes, her case is that of; ''dribbling the snails in the pot to eat the meat''.. might as well have gone straight for the ''meat''.(interpretation = she was going to date the bloke anyway, might as well have done that without the long chase first).
     Back to my first point, if there is a true liking for someone, it really shouldn't matter who said the first ''i like you'' or who said ''lets go for coffee'' or in fact, who leaned in for the first lip-touching or tonguing (whatever cooks your beans/floats your raft). A case study of this is Dannii Minogue and her partner, Kris. She has mentioned well and clearly in the past that she made the first move, initiated the tonguing and blah blah. That was almost three years ago. They have a son now and are playing ''happy families''. Kris didn't lose interest because she made the first moves. His Twitter handle is @KrisSmith13 btw. *Fine man like this* choi! *now whispering* ..i would have made the first move if i were in her shoes. Forget the fact that Danni is a public figure, I have also heard about everyday people(yes, Nigerian girls too) who went for it and they got what they wanted and are happy with their partners.
     Now, this is just my view/opinion. I really don't think asking someone out should have to do with your gender. I personally do not enjoy ''the chase'' i think it's annoying and pointless(all the attitude giving and dramatic head shaking and ''no'', i'm not cheap b.s talk..)
I will like to know what you think about it. Is it just in a few cases that the woman going for the kill will work, not diverting from the norm that ''The man is a lion, he should hunt for prey(woman)?'' or am i completely right? ''Gender should not be the determinant factor of who does the ''hunting'' ....I'm not in any way saying that women should do the chase and be begging for the dude's number and begging for a date(i'm ROTFL)..that'll be awfully bizarre. I will never do this, because, of course, my pride.

Normalcy Versus Fairness

   A few days ago, in the comfort of my room, i slotted in a dvd, grabbed a chocolate and settled to watch the modern day adaptation movie of one of William Shakespear's greatest works; Romeo and Juliet- yes i'm that boring. While i watched, i reminsced about my childhood. My mother always told me this beautiful story of love, i childishly and sheepishly imagined this type of deeply engrossing love existed. There is a part of the story i've always hated, till this day; when Romeo thought Juliet was dead and he drank poison and juliet awoke soon after, realising her love was dead, she kissed his cold lips to get as much of the poison left on them so she could savour death and join her Romeo in peace in the afterlife, away from the world's troubles.      It was annoying to me and always bothered me as to why he took the poison. Firstly, even if she was dead, does that mean he can't find another person? what  type of love story/fairy tale was this, where there was no happy ending? just a sad tale of how two lovers died. I apologise for boring your mind and seeming overly corny, this is quite besides the point of my writing.
    After watching the movie, i unwillingly started thinking about relationships and if there is any truth to love abiding within them. My thoughts were also largely triggered by twitter; people talking about their relationships and what not,especially girls
  My thoughts went as such;
 Now that i'm no longer a child, i realise, or i think there is no Romeo and Juliet love anywhere except for in storybooks and in Shakespear's head, In fact, it's hard enough finding people who genuinely like you, talkless of love you. I don't mean to say people don't like me on a large scale. The one thing i thought most about was; why date someone if you don't actually truly like/love them? I'm not talking high school ''dating'' because obviously, most people do that for status. 
   Easily, i can imagine that you are throwing answers like ''so that you can have somebody to gbensh'', or,  ''because the person is fine''. My question is, given those answers, is it fair on the other person? I'm not going to be biased in my writing and refer to only guys because girls do it too...but Guys, on a larger scale, especially our ''royal highnesses'', the Nigerian men.
Lets divert a little, imagine this scenario; you're a girl, this guy is always chykying you(forgive my coloquial english), you didn't fancy this bloke before but later you do(which is often the case with girls), because ofcourse, you've been getting attention. As you now like this dude, you want to take things up a notch(not that you've mentioned it but y'all know wassup). Everything is going perfect, then somehow, you find tangible evidence that you weren't even looking for, you are not the only girl your ''oga'' has been smooth sailing. In fact,he has girlfriend number one at home.
  Now that you have built this scenario in your head, you're probably thinking ''that's a normal thing, he was only increasing his chances of a YES from a girl''.... My question again, is it fair? Much as people always say it's not the first nor last time that kind of thing will happen, it's ''normal''...i would like to point out that it is deceitful, dishonest and every other thing synonmous. Also, because it is a ''common'' thing doesn't mean you should join in the foolywang. Why and what is the point in leading someone on when you can just hook up with some hoe(use a condom) or tell the person you want to straff about your intentions to stray.(believe me, some girls will still oblige).
   This one time, I was having a conversation with a guy and he told me he once told three girls he loved them, on the same night and he was lying but who cares, since he got what he wanted, too bad for them. Then he later said, if he's girlfriend finds out, he's dead. I had refrain myself from throwing up huge buckets. What sort of mad behaviour?? i cannot just understand it. This guy claims he's actions are justifiable due to the fact that it's a common occurence. Then i thought, people rob banks and commit murders, does the fact that murder and robbery rates in a place are high, justify the act that is killing and stealing? it's the same thing really.
  As i was initially saying, about ''truly having affection towards your partner. If you actually love like your partner, you won't intentionally do anything to harm them. This does sound cliche but it's true. When it's not like someone poured blended peppers into your brains, why would you go ahead multi dating and in effect, lying. People, dudes in general say they don't want to be trapped in a relationship, well then, don't enter one. If you enter one, and intend on sleeping around, let your partner know. Some women wouldn't mind, as for the fact, you'd told them where you stand...long as you treat the person right.
  Much as this is my opinion and people will still go around thinking ''abeg joh, it's okay/normal to do it..long as he/she doesn't find out'', i think i speak for loads of other people who think it's unfair. I personally cannot stand dishonesty.(pet peeve).
  In conclusion, with all the bravado that men tend to do, they too can be mushy( don't be deceived), after all, isn't it men who usually write the best poems and songs about affection?.. there are ''a few good eggs'', of which, i'm glad i know some, starting with my father. I like how he respects my mother, undiluted, real affection and dedication. *thumbs up papi* ...hehe.